Oscar review part 2: Worst of the Red Carpet

While we loved many of the looks that graced the Oscars' red carpet this year, our review wouldn't be complete without citing the turkeys as well as the triumphs. Without further ado, we present the 2008 Class of What-Was-She-Thinking:

Tilda Swinton: To attend as a guest looking like you escaped from fashion jail is one thing. To attend as a nominee in such a state is another. To actually win when you look like ... well, like this, we'll just have to assume you decided to give the "Oscar curse" a headstart. We could almost forgive the nonexistent hair and makeup, but wrapping up the whole package in a velvet (or is it pleather?) Hefty bag is beyond the pale (pun intended).

Cameron Diaz: The dress itself isn't bad, but we can't fathom why the famously tan Cam didn't stop at the salon and top off her bronze before the big event. As it is, the color is too close to her skintone, and, combined with the messy (not in a good way) hair and minimal makeup, it just makes her look tired. Come on, Cammy, we know you've got it in you to do better than this.

Saoirse Ronan: Umm, girlfriend, can we talk for a sec? Sure, you're only 13, but hey, Emma Watson's been rocking red carpets since she was, like, 8. Is a little eyeliner and some semblance of a hairstyle too much to ask? Here again, we don't hate the dress, but the color washes her out and the shape only accentuates her lack of a figure. Maybe this Hollywood newbie will find herself a style mentor before her next red carpet romp.

And there you have it, dears: the good, the bad, and the "OMG, fire your stylist now." This is the part where we say we hope the style sinners mend their ways, but let's be honest—how much fun would it be if they were all winners?